MattKendrick.com

Yep. As of today, Dec. 30th I’m another year older. I’m glad for everyday of life and what it brings. It may get crazy sometimes, but it’s my life. In years past we’ve always celebrated my birthday at home on New Years Eve. But this year we’re having a party with family and friends in Richmond. I’m very excited. My wife and our friend Katie have been busy planning the event.

Famous Athletes

I thought it would be interesting to share some facts about my birthday. Apparently I share a birthday with some interesting people. I’m sure you don’t know Pro Golfer, Tiger Woods. It’s not like he hasn’t been in the media enough. Another athlete Sammy Koufax, who once pitched a perfect game in Baseball, also shares my birthday. Let’s not forget baskball player LeBron James also shares my birthday. That rounds up famous athletes.

Famous Musicians

How about famous musicians? I share a birthday with two members of The Monkees, Davy Jones and Micheal Nesmith. Great, I’m gonna have “Hey Hey We’re the Monkees,” stuck in my head all day now. Punk/Rock singer Patti Smith also born on my birthday. Folk Singer, Noel Paul Stookey of Peter, Paul and Marry was born on my birthday. I’ll be listening to Puff The Magic Dragon as well. Let’s move on to famous TV personalities and actors/actresses.

Famous TV Personalities and Actors/Actresses

Bert Parks, a former host of the Miss. America Pageant born on the Dec. 30th as well. Only a year older Eliza Dushku of “Dollhouse” also shares my birthday. My wife loves the show. It’s a shame they’re canceling it. A year younger, Kristin Kreuk of “Smallville” was born on my birthday.

I found some historical events that happen on my birthday. But I mainly found war and destruction. Kinda depressing. One geeky fact: Dec. 30th 1985 IBM-PC DOS Version 3.2 Released. But you can see for yourself. Well that’s it for today. I’m gonna relax a bit and reflect on years past.

More Famous Birthdays – Dec. 30th

This Day In History – Dec. 30th

A few months ago, The Sims 3
hit store shelves. For our anniversary, my wife bought the collectors edition. Sweet present, don’t ya agree? I dove right in and played for hours. However, this version and previous versions have left me with the same question. “Why couldn’t life be more like the Sims?” Take a look at how easy Sims have it.

1. Learning is easy. Click and know!

I need to learn how to cook and repair stuff today. I’ll just start out in the morning. Alright let me grab my books. I’ll read at warp speed. Three hours later, I’m now a master chef and repair person! I can cook without setting the kitchen on fire or fix stuff without electrocuting myself!

2. Don’t like your environment? Complain!

I’m not happy with my pad! I’m just gonna scream, shout and point to whatever I don’t like. Like magic it will either go away or get replaced with something nicer. That neon sign on the wall is too tacky. No biggie! Wahhhhh! OOOOH LAAA!

3. Jobs are easy to obtain. Everyone is hiring in the Sim world.

Bummer, I’ve gotta get a job? Let’s just pick up the paper. Oh there’s so many exciting jobs. I want to be a writer when I grow up. I’ll just start delivering papers now. No interview needed, just start on Monday!

4. Spin yourself around to dress yourself.

Oh time to change clothes. No biggie, I’ll just jump and spin around. Presto I’m decked out for whatever occasion. Gotta put on my work clothes. I’ll stop and spin again to get ready for work. Time for bed, let me just spin into something more comfortable!

5. Can’t make it to the bathroom. Just go wherever you are!

Oh man someone’s in the bathroom. I’ve gotta go real bad. Oh well, I just went on my nice hardwood floors. Now I’ll cry and clean it up later.

6. Whatever I need or whenever I need it, will appear in thin air!

Man, it sure would be fun to have a rocket to blast into outer space. Let me pull one out of my ass. Oh there it is. Ut oh! I peed on the floor again. Poof! Oh there’s my mop! “Singing in the rain… Singing in the rain…”

Isn’t life with the Sims easy? I would think so. Maybe it’s a little too easy. Granted I’m sure it would get old after a while. But at the end of the day. It’s a video game. Like other video games, it’s a fantasy world. If it were that easy, it would be kinda boring. Life on the Sims kinda reminds me of the Enzyte, natural male enhancement guy. “Look at Bob, he’s happy….” If you haven’t played it, be sure to check it out
.

Looking for love advice. Looking for good love advice? Well don’t look for it on The Dog House Diaries Comics site. But the comics, they’re freak’n hilarious! The comic is written by three guys: Ray, Rafaan and Will. Together they release three comics a week. The drawings are drawn in semi-stick figure fashion. Topics seem to vary from computers, gaming to relationships. Check it out!

I can’t believe this service exists. But I had to pass it on. A group of dedicated animal lovers, and atheists will take care of your pets after the rapture. For a small fee that is. This is golden. What a scam. I’m sure someone out there may have fell for this one. I do believe in the rapture as I am a Christian. But when it comes (if I’m still around by then), I’m not going to be worried about my pets. Hey, don’t all dogs go to heaven? But anyways. Have a good laugh and check it out with the link below.

eternal-earthbound-pets.com

A few years a go a friend of mine emailed this list. Some of the things on this list have lost their reference. But I still think it’s funny. After reading through it again, I wonder how many of these things my friends and I attempted. Looking back, I wouldn’t put it past my  friends and I.

Our town was so small that we didn’t have a Walmart. We had to drive 25 miles to the nearest store. Oddly enough, Walmart was often a venue for dates in Pike County. I know that sounds backwards and redneck like. But I do remember going to Walmart in a suite after Homecoming, only after going to Jerry’s for dinner. Yes, I did ask for crayons at Jerrys. Anyways. Have fun reading the list!

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing football — see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and yell, ”I need some tampons!!”
6. Try on bras over top of your clothes.
7. Make a trail of orange juice on the ground, leading to the restrooms.
8. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible ”Sex and Candy”
9. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, ”I think we’ve got a Code 3 in Housewares,” and see what happens.
10. Tune all the radios to a polka station, then turn them all off and turn the volumes to ”10.”
11. Play with the automatic doors.
12. Walk up to complete strangers and say, ”Hi! I haven’t seen you in so long!…” etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
13. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, ”Who BUYS this shit, anyway?”
14. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.
15. Put pairs of women’s panties on your head and walk around the store casually.
16. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins.
17. . Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
18. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, ”Wow. Magic!”
19. Put M&M’s on layaway.
20. Move ”Caution: Wet Floor” signs to carpeted areas.
21. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you’ll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
22. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
23. Nonchalantly ”test” the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
24. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,”…I’m Batman. Come, Robin — to the Batcave!”
25. TP as much of the store as possible.
26. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
27. Play with the calculators so that they all spell ”hello” upside down. (01134)
28. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, ”Why won’t you people just leave me alone?”
29. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, ”Red Rover!”
30. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.
31. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
32. Take bets on the battle described above.
33. Set up another battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. Barbie. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect…)
34. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
35. While no one’s watching, quickly switch the men’s and women’s signs on the doors of the restrooms.
36. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from ”Mission: Impossible.’
37. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
38. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
39. Fill an entire cart with boxes of condoms, and watch everyone’s jaws drop when you attempt to buy them.
40. Set up a ”Valet Parking” sign in front of the store.
41. Two words: ”Marco Polo.’
42. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
43. ”Re-alphabetize” the CDs in Electronics.
44. In the auto department, practice your ”Madonna” look with various funnels. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like ”the fat man walks alone,” and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them.
45. While walking around alone, pretend someone is with you and get into a very serious conversation. Exp: The person is breaking up with you and you begin crying ”How could you do this to me? I thought you loved me! I knew there was another girl, but I thought I had won.” Then act as though you are being beaten and fall onto the ground screaming and having convulsions.
46. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, ”No, no! It’s those voices again!”
47. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
48. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax.If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don’t get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
49. Get a stuffed animal, go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying ”Good girl, good Bessie.”
50. Go over to the shoe department and try on every pair of shoes, not putting one pair back. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.
51. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
52. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
53. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
54. Test the fishing rods and see what you can ”catch” from the other aisles.
55. In the makeup department, spray yourself with every perfume there is, then walk up to a boy who is with a girl and start flirting with him as ditisily as possible: ”Hi! (giggle) What’s your sign? (giggle).” When the boy shows no interest, start hitting on the girl the exact same way. ”Hi! (giggle) What’s your sign? (giggle).”
56. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
57. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
58. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially through narrow aisles. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
59. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
60. Say things like, ”Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?”
61. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., ”Do you have any Shnerples here?”
62. Ride a display bicycle through the store — claim you’re taking it for a ”test drive.”
63. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
64. Get boxes of condoms and randomly slip them into peoples’ carts when they aren’t paying attention.

I thought this was a really interesting/funny trailer for the Sims 3. Talks about the horror of kids seeing their parents getting it on. Been playing the Sims 3 for a few weeks now. I’m pretty impressed. My characters are based off my wife, my friends and myself. So far Heather’s character has just about maxed out her journalism career. My character is a CEO of a large company. Our house doesn’t quite reflect the lifestyle yet. I’m still working on that. Hopefully I will have some pictures to show soon. Till then enjoy the funny trailer.

Pac-Man Joins Twitter - Scott Hampson

Thought I would share this with you. My only question is, “Will they stop following him once he powers up?” What if your favorite video game characters joined twitter? Mario on Twitter! Scott Hampson has some more of these great cartoons on his blog at http://twit-ha.tumblr.com

Today, I thought I would look at my desktop at work and write about something I see. One of the things that stuck out to me, was my tin of Bacon Beans. What? Thought you’d never ask. They’re bacon flavored jelly beans. Little red and white colored, bacon flavored jelly beans. One bite and you won’t believe your mouth. The experience is surreal. Except its not real bacon and doesn’t contain any protein. Probably not all that good for ya either.

How did you acquire these beans? My wife got me these for Christmas last year. I like keeping them on my desk for when people stop by. They’re a real conversation piece. I like watching people try them for the first time. The look on their faces is priceless. Where can you get these magic beans? We’ve found them locally at Hastings in Richmond, KY. But you can find them online at www.mcphee.com Till then, dogs don’t know its not bacon!